I‘m writing this as I sit in a spinning chair at a hair salon getting my auburn locks rolled into “tiny” little yellow perm rollers. When I retired my gummy bracelets, jelly sandals, lace hair bows and pink ruffled tops AGES ago, I vowed–VOWED!–never to get another perm. I also vowed never to get married again, stop drinking Coke, cut down on clothes spending, and give up spiked high heels. Yeah, that didn’t work so well. At all. So here I sit. It’s amazing when you proclaim to yourself that you are going to make major changes in your life what goes through your mind. I’ve “started over” for the last time too many times to count. I’ve been at the lowest of lows when I just basically said, “F&@% IT!” and started anew. Like my favorite quote says: “Rock bottom became a SOLID foundation on which I rebuilt my life.” Amen to that.
I don’t get in funks (I prefer that over midlife crisis, thank you) as often as I used to. I find things to keep me busy, keep me happy, keep me content more than I used to. I’m much more happy and satisfied than I used to be “many” years ago. (Note: Yes, I lie about my age, and I will as long as I can! So there!) Now I try to find small miracles and pleasures throughout my daily routines. But sometimes–like now–I get down and can’t snap out of it. Maybe it’s the change in seasons, less daylight, that whole Vitamin D thing, more stressed. Be advised that is when all should be warned something drastic is going to happen. Because I don’t deal with unhappiness for long. From myself or especially others. Ask yourself sometime, how much space, how much TIME do you have in YOUR life for negativity? Umm, yeah, I didn’t have time to do a load of dishes today so there probably isn’t any cheese to go with your whine either. NEXT!
I used to color or highlight my hair years back when I needed a change. I don’t do that anymore, mainly because my auburn hair is my trademark and to mess with that would be like messing with karma. Yeah….. no. But a new cut? A new style? It’s extreme but obviously right now I need to make a bold move before I lose my mind. I need a new do to play with different hair styles, makeup looks, products to test. A new season is here and what a way to lift my spirits then by mixing and matching fashions, trying new nail styles, makeup looks and putting them all with the new hair style. I need a day in my room, a notebook for sketches and ideas. Add a camera to click pictures of my new creations then enjoy the fun of putting them into action.
I’ve done the clothes style change a few times. Tried the preppy look, went Coco Chanel-ish, dressed punk, went Cali girl, went call girl. LoL! Oh epic fails on them all. My style is rocker wild–head to toe! I love my black leather, my studs (ha!), my chains, my skin tight worn jeans and bold eye liner. Yeah, that may be so yesterday but it’s SO me. So even if I changed parts of my style, I’d still be me. And I like me.
As far as being in a funk, I’ve even done the tattoo and piercing route. With as many as I have been through, I am (thankfully) coming to an end with all that. I THINK I’ve pierced everything I want and even things I didn’t know I could. I added five tats this year to my previous minuscule two that I already had. Part of me would like to think I’m done but I’m probably not. I don’t just ink to ink. Everything has a spot, a meaning, and a purpose. So we will see where life takes me, and see if it justifies a tat in the future. Perms wash out–GOOD tattoos don’t. Perms are cheaper too. Remember that if you feel antsy for change.
I’m rolled. My head is covered in elastic rods with hair yanked to the point of tears. What we do for beauty & happiness, ya know? As my girl begins to put the solution on my hair, the smell takes me back to my teen years. I now have an urge to listen to Tiffany and Cheap Trick, maybe even plan a mall tour. God, I need a life.
Tick, tick, tick. Back to the sink. More rinsing, more blotting, more solutions, even MORE rinsing, then the unroll with the final rinse. As I walk back to the chair, peaking through a raveled hole in the towel, I see my hair. It’s wavy, a bit lighter in color, and shiny as hell. I love it! I don’t even want her to dry or style it. I just want to pay the girl and head straight for home so I can style it up (and take some selfies of course!)
So what is the moral of this story? It’s kind of simple, in fact. You don’t have to be as drastic as me when it comes to an “I need a change!” revelation. Sure, you can go all out, but it doesn’t have to cost a fortune to FEEL like a goddess. Sometimes it can be reading a motivational book. Maybe it’s buying a lipstick in a color outside of your comfort zone. You could give yourself a manicure with a seasonal color or design. Lock yourself in the bathroom, pampering yourself starting with a deep hair condition treatment all the way to a pretty pedi with all the treats in between. Maybe it’s a new sensual scent. You can even take a drive, open the windows, crank up your favorite tunes and just go! (Take your camera…you may see some beautiful scenes!) But you see, I know me. And I knew I had to do something major, something drastic. Go big or go home. And I did just that. Big waves, big curls, big ego, resulting in a big dose of self confidence.
Adam Ant just came on the radio. I flashback to the music I was probably listening to when I got my last perm. Now I’ll take my memories of then, blend them with my new hair and current rocker-style fashions & accessories, stand straight and confident, and be ready to face any day head on. Hello me!!! Beside, how does that saying go?: “You can take the girl out of the 80′s but you can NEVER take the 80′s out of the girl.”? Today certainly proved that.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I think I’ll drink a Bartles & James wine cooler if I can find one (strawberry of course), listen to some Kinks and do my nails…. neon pink, what else?