Tag Archives: men

It begins…

4 Dec

Coffee of the Day (COTD): French Pressed Triple Chocolate with frothed Amaretto Creamer, dusted with Cocoa Powder. My mug of choice is a pink polka- dotted mug that says “HERS”:

Happy Monday Sassinitas!
You may notice a new section to the right of of here. It’s entitled “Coffee Talk”. Anyone who knows me knows I have a not-so-secret obsession with coffee. I like to make different flavors in different ways, enjoyed in different cups. It has also become a routine for me to make a fab cup of coffee, grab my iPad and start writing. I don’t need it to stay awake or jump start my writing process. It has just come to the point where coffee and writing go hand in hand. Like now.

Starting today, I will be posting the occasional piece in the “Coffee Talk” section where I may talk about anything and everything. It might be an inspirational quote, it might be a description of my day, it may be a pretty picture I took or found, it could also be just me ranting or raving about anything and everything or nothing at all. You just don’t know!

So I encourage you to look out for my “Coffee Talk” posts. There is only one catch…

…the posts will be password protected!

So if you want to see what I post – just in this section – you are going to have to request the password from me! Trust me, there will be nothing sketchy posted. It may be serious, it may often be funny. It may have to deal with a personal frustration, or it may have to do with a success story. It could be anything, but I’m sure you’ll be entertained!

So what are you waiting for? Shoot me an email or “Contact Sassy” so you can get the password to keep up with my rants and rambles!

Let’s have some fun!!!

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Honk If You’re ….Awesome!

11 Jul

ConfidenceToday was another standard day at my “regular” job. Appointments went smooth, customers were great, conversations were fun. My day ended early, however, because I had an appointment to get some routine maintenance done on my car. On my way to my parking spot, it’s standard procedure for me to cross a very busy road. The closer to rush hour, the busier it is. Today I left before the car chaos began but it was still pretty busy. Before I even got to the curb to cross the road to my car, a large flatbed truck with three guys in it approached my sidewalk position. As I stopped for the fast-moving traffic, the truck occupants proceeded to honk, wave and stare. I’d be shocked if it was the first time this happened, but it wasn’t. Not to blow my own horn (pardon the pun), but it happens about 2-3 times a week. Some women would be shocked or even offended, but at this point, it doesn’t phase me anymore. Some men will just be men. I will take it as a compliment.

Now don’t think I’m a conceited princess who thinks the world stops when I enter a room or walk out a door. In fact, I’m just the opposite. I was the ultimate dork in high school (which was a quite a while ago). Even now, I hate my teeth, I have no boobs, I’m too thin, and I’m trying to get through a major hair mishap that happened six months ago. Sure, my husband tells me I’m beautiful, but I think it’s unwritten marriage law he needs to a few times a month. (He means it though, I know.) Women often express displeasure with my size. The fact that I can eat the entire drive-thru menu at McDonalds for lunch and never gain a pound does not make me many friends. The phrase, “I hate you for that!” has been said on more than one occasion. Seriously, do I have to show you photos of my healthy 6’3″ father who only weighed 160 lbs? Come on people… Please. It’s genetics and metabolism–don’t hate the gene pool.

In my opinion, I’m not beautiful, not gorgeous and barely average. So, why do I get honks, waves and smiles? Well an easy answer could be that I work in a town where there aren’t many “average” girls, but that’s not true. I think it goes beyond that. In fact, it goes into an area where we all could take a lesson or two. And guess what? I’m going to give it to you.
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Being “attractive” goes beyond skin deep. Granted, taking care of yourself to keep your skin in great condition and using products to slow the hands of time doesn’t hurt. Wearing the things that fit right and make you look pretty is a plus too. Taking care of your mind, body and soul is youthful–inside and out. But a lot of what turns heads isn’t on the surface. It’s other things. Three simple things, actually:

Smile. A nice smile doesn’t just light up your face, it lights up your soul. It illuminates you. You shine. I don’t care if your teeth need a bleaching or your lips are chapped. A smile shows the world you are happy where you are and life is good. Who wouldn’t appreciate that? You’ve dealt with everything life has dealt you and you’ve still survived with a smile. That’s appealing (and intriguing) to many!

Walk tall. Walk with a spring in your step. Walk like you have someplace important to be. Walk like YOU are important. This stirs curiosity. Who is this girl? What is she doing? Where is she going? People will think “I want to do what she’s doing!” or “Holy composed, Batman, who is THAT?!” There doesn’t have to be a reason for you to bleed confidence–you just have to hold yourself, walk, talk, and stand like you own the world in the palm of your hand. Practice. Put on a pair of heels and stand in front of a mirror. Stand straight. Shoulders back. Smile. Tilt your head. Don’t pose like a hussy but stand like you are royalty. A little confidence goes a long way.

Start the day & finish the day with class. It doesn’t matter if you work 9-5, spend the day running errands or are labeled as the mom taxi. You have no reason to look “frumpy”. Ever. EVER! Even if you stay home all day doing dishes and vacuuming, you better put on some lipstick and mascara to get the mail. Yes, the MAIL! There is no excuse for you not to put on something to make you feel good about yourself: makeup, perfume, your favorite top, tight jeans, jazzy shoes. Anything. Just pamper yourself. You deserve it! Whether it be for three minutes or three hours, treat yourself nice. No matter how boring or routine your day is, lift yourself up. It will lighten your spirits and others will notice. Now, also remember this–how you start the day is how you should end it. Keep your hair neat, makeup fresh, lips tinted, standing strong, being happy. From start to finish–even if you have to paint on a smile–finish the day strong. No matter how tired or drained you are, let no one see it. To them…AND you?
You. Are. Invincible.

Now, don’t get me wrong. Doing these things doesn’t guarantee you a horn honk crossing through the parking lot at your local CVS. But you will at least get you a look from both men and women. Men are attracted and curious about your confidence, your tenacity, your spirit. Women will look too, of course. They will look you over–head to toe (oh, you know that’s how they are). They may be curious about your assurance, your poise and your certainty, but like a typical female, they will also check out your shoes and bag! The fact is, you walked into a room like you owned it. Even though you might be falling apart on the inside, you are totally together on the out. This confidence will not just lift you up to a whole new level, but you’ll be surprised… you might even get a honk or two. Or ten!

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Valentine’s Day Treats…Man Style!

10 Feb



This Sunday, the holiday for lovers will be upon us. Malls are flooded with the usual red, white and pink items and ensembles including the sticky and sweet, the soft and cuddly, the fragrant and flowery, and the shiny and sparkly. Even if you can’t read a calendar, you’d really have to be a hermit crab—with shell in tow—to not know what day is right around the corner. Even with all the hints around, I have to sadly say, I’ve seen a few cracked hermit crab shells around February 15th in years gone by. And the shell looked like it had a nicely placed stiletto heel imprint too. Go figure.


Even though many men think this holiday is a retail-concocted façade to make them shell out ridiculous amounts of cash to materialistically show their affection, some women feel that it is a last-chance holiday for men to have a second chance after blowing it completely on Christmas. Yes, it is true, if you still have a place in bed after getting her the new and improved rug steamer this past holiday season, here’s your chance fellas to make up for lost ground. And maybe even lost time… if you get my drift.


But even though it is, without a doubt, a holiday where the focus seems to be on the women, I think many men would agree that the statement, “What about me?” can come into play. Sure, they want to feel loved and special too. They want to know their lady cares. They want to know that they are loved. They want to know they are their girl’s #1 squeeze. They just don’t want to know it with a three-foot teddy bear tied with a bunch of Mylar balloons and a wrapped pair of conversation candy hearts boxers. Okay, some may like that, and there’s nothing wrong with that at all. I, in fact, think those boxers are damn cute myself. But I can’t picture Mr. Sassy acting genuinely excited if I was to have that delivered to his work as a gift.


So what else can you get the guy who isn’t a sicky-sweet gushy romantic on the day that revolves around hearts and goo? Well, I dove way back into my mind to remember what were some of the things I had gotten for Mr. Sassy over the years. Plus I had a little help from a friend or two with ideas of their own. Hopefully this will give you ladies a few leads before you tackle the mall:


• Meats & Cheeses –
Even though men love cheddar-topped hamburgers and strip steaks with gorgonzola butter, things like that can get a little messy in a gift box. Why not take a trip to your local market or specialty store and make up a tasty gift with various specialty protein-type items. Don’t forget things like different crackers and spreads too. Some of my favorite go-to treats include: Gruyere, Manchego, Smoked Gouda and Drunken Goat Cheese; Sopressata, Prosciutto, and even flavored beef jerky. For an extra special treat, throw in a nice wine that goes with the cheeses you’ve selected (do some online research) and make it a treat for you both!


• Cigars –
Not every guy likes to smoke, and even fewer wives and girlfriends like to see them smoke. Guys think there is something rich and soothing about a good cigar. Plus, it screams guy-time in the man-cave. Even I have to admit, I like a good rich smoke now and then (and yes I have the pictures to prove it!) If cigars are something you despise but he likes, then go out and spend a chunk of change and get him just one or two really good cigars. That way he won’t smoke them all the time around you and he’ll really take in the cigar’s flavor and appreciate the ones you got him. A few good choices that most guys would like are: Ashton VSG’s, Romeo y Julieta, or a Camacho Triple Maduro. For an extra bonus, get him a good scotch to go with it!


• A dozen of beers –
Yes, leave the roses for the females and get the guy twelve long-necked bottles of different and eclectic beers. It is hard to “mix and match” when it comes to flavors, but if you ladies have a couple of friends who like the idea, go in on it together. You and two girls can pick out six different 6-packs and each pull two of each pack to make a dozen. For different flavors from around the world, go to a local beer distributor for the best selection. Some ideas to look for are Belgian beers, sweet stouts, amber ales or Pilsners. Throw in a nice glass beer mug to make it a gift he’ll never forget.


• Magazine subscriptions –
This is a gift that really shows you care about him AND pay attention to his interests and hobbies. Plus he’ll be entertained all year ‘round. Is he a sports fanatic? …SI or ESPN the Magazine is a no-brainer. History buffs really enjoy National Geographic or Time. And don’t forget some other male favorites he might enjoy. Bon Appetit, Food and Wine, Cigar Aficionado, Esquire, Men’s Fitness, The New Yorker, and Maxim are all very popular choices. Take a trip to your local bookstore, go through the magazine department, and pull one of each magazine you think he’d like. Wrap them up with the filled out subscription card taped to the front of each, having them billed to you. He’ll love the sentiment.


If all of this has you even more confused about what to get your guy this Valentine’s Day, don’t forget… you can never go wrong with “a little bit of everything.” Go all out and give him a smorgasbord of goodies. Hell, no man will deny that variety is the spice of life. (In fact, that longing for variety gets them in too much trouble at times.. cough cough.) Grab a gift bag, basket or even a chip bowl works great too… especially one that has his favorite football or baseball team on it. Then start filling it up. For example, grab a brick of Merlot-flavored parmesan cheese and a stick of pepperoni, some whole-grain wheat crackers, a nice spicy honey mustard, a six pack of good ale, a couple of decent cigars, a nice travel coffee mug, a personalized beer mug, a subscription to Rolling Stone magazine, some gourmet caramel popcorn, and a few king-sized portions of his favorite candies or chocolate bars. Put them all in a nice wicker basket, then tie it all up with a big red bow. He’ll love it!


…. and if you really want to go the extra romantic mile? Throw in a pair of love-struck Marvin the Martian red and black boxers for good measure. Now that’s hot!

Men: What Not To Shop For Right Before Christmas…

20 Dec

The time to shop is running out this holiday season, and if you are the typical male, you probably either have just begun to think about venturing out into the malls OR you think you still have at least 5 days left. Be advised that as the time ticks away, your options are getting smaller and smaller. Which means you will enter the frenzied shopping world with limited options or worse… without a clue.  So what are possible choices for gifts to give your special lady this Christmas season?  Well, although I do not know what she likes, I can probably tell you what she doesn’t. Based on years of experience, I will share these ideas with you and the reasoning behind them so you can know what she is thinking (which puts you ahead of the curve already). Get ready… take notes:

    Do not buy her lingerie. You are thinking, “Why wouldn’t she like something sexy? Something pretty? Something that says I find her hot and attractive?”  Because that might be what you are thinking when you head out to buy it but that is not what it says when it gets unwrapped on Christmas day. First off, be honest—isn’t the person that swanky outfit is really for is YOU?  Yeah, it is.. and your little lady KNOWS that is what you are thinking! She also knows that because you picked YOUR favorite color, not hers.  It is also a fact that you go in to those stores without a CLUE as to what size we are.  So who do you envision in your mind when picking out the outfit?  Yup… the salesgirl. So if you buy a nightie that you think will look good and fit Stacie the Sexy Saleschick, I’d bet money it might not be the best choice for your lady.  It’s a no-win situation. If you really want her to get something alluring, show her a store catalog, ask her what she likes and what size she’d wear… and remember!!!!
    Do not buy her perfume. Unless she has taped a sample vial or an advertisement from a magazine to your car’s dashboard or the bathroom mirror with a note that says “This One”, don’t bother. What you like most likely won’t be what she likes. Not to mention, what it smells like in the bottle probably won’t come close to smelling the same way when your princess puts it on her.  And even more so?  Just because the Susan the Sexy Saleschick smells good in a specific perfume doesn’t mean your girl will smell good in it or even like it all all. If you really want your Mrs. Claus to smell yummy, get her a gift card and go with her when she uses it. Or better yet, pick her up a current fashion magazine, lift up each of the sample flaps, and ask her what is her favorite is. And let her know if you like it too!
    Do not buy her appliances. Even if she makes a list of things she NEEDS for Christmas, only get her things she WANTS. No woman WANTS appliances. The only exception to this rule is if your girlfriend or wife has a hobby that involves the kitchen in some way. For example, a woman would find it romantic if you took the time to find her special spatulas or baking stones if she enjoys making cakes or candies during her down time. That is a good thing. A woman would NOT find it romantic if you get her a turbo-nuclear microwave so she can heat up your leftovers faster in the evening. And giving her things with a blade or a sharp edge only provides her a weapon to use on you if you mess up on any other gifts. If you really want to get your significant other something she might like using in the kitchen, ask her what things every person with her hobby or interest has that she doesn’t.
    Do not buy her anything relating to her car. This includes gift certificates for car washes, oil changes, gas fill ups, a snow scraper, new wiper blades, floor mats, or seat covers. Even though she will insist to you that she is a modern day woman and can handle anything and everything in regards to the car herself (which she can, don’t patronize her!), deep down she still wants you to do it.  If you really want to give her anything in regards to her vehicle, a nice, feminine engraved keychain with a special sentiment is always a gift from the heart that will be cherished all year.
    Do not give her cash. Dude, that’s just tacky. And shows laziness beyond belief. But you are probably saying “But what is the difference between cash and a gift card??”  There is a BIG difference whacknut! Cash means you don’t care. A gift card means you went into the store, looked around, knew there were things in there that she would like and YOU liked and wanted her to be able to pick out exactly what will make her happy. It also means you are looking forward to the day that you will take her to a nice lunch and to the mall so you can smile as she tries on clothes and shoes for hours with you. And you pretend, with your best lying face possible, that you are enjoying every minute of it more than you enjoy life itself….GOT IT?

So what are safe bets this late in the shopping season?  Well, I’m not expert, but here are some no fail gifts that any woman would most likely be happy with. Remember we all aren’t the same, but we are pretty close:

    – Jewelry (necklaces and bracelets especially)
    – Reservations for a weekend getaway (bed and breakfast, romantic suite)
    – Maid service for a month/year
    – Tickets to a show SHE would like to see
    – All the fixings for a “date night” (dinner gift certificate, movie tickets and a gift card to buy a special outfit)
    – A large, framed print of a photo that means a lot to her (a place you went this year, a special event)
    – And when all else fails, gift cards to places such as:

    * Macy’s * …………. * Sephora * …………………… * Victoria’s Secret *
    * Pottery Barn * ….. * Williams & Sonoma *……….* JC Penney’s *
    * TJ Maxx * ……….. * Marshall’s * ……………………* Yankee Candle *